Category Archives: culture

An American Trilogy

I don’t usually share my poetry, but guns are the exception to every rule. This trilogy was originally posted as images to my twitter account (@TheoloGOP) in June of 2015. (Those images are at the end of this post.)

Guns kill, but they do so much more than that. You can change a life without ending it. Today, I’m worrying about changed lives in Virginia Beach.

The Drill.

Listen my children and you shall hear
What to do should a gun appear.

Look to your teachers.
Their job’s to save you.

They will scream or whisper
what you must next do.

Find somewhere to hide, if the gun is still far.
(Just make sure you don’t leave the door ajar.)

If the gun is near, so is your end.
Lie low.
Don’t move.
Play dead.

American Make Believe.


Broken Windows.

Fire a bullet into a glass pane. It will make a little hole.
But radiating from that hole? A web of shatter…
Exponentially larger and more devastating to the whole.

Fire a bullet into a human being. It can end them.
But radiating from that death? A web of shatter…
Exponentially larger and more devastating to humanity.

Tens of thousands a year, here. Taken by the gun.
All of those stones dropped in the dark water.
Huge. Horrible. But only a whisper of the scream.
The scream of all those ripples.

The ripples survived the gunshot. The ripples carry on.
But don’t deceive yourself. We weren’t spared.

The Living. 

Eye Contact.

The person in your grocery store, struggling with a simple chore.
“It’s harder for me than it is for you. I got shot.”

The young person pushed in a wheelchair, by an older one they take after.
“I’m not as independent as you are. I got shot.”

The parents who spend holidays in a hospital, lavishing love on the unaware.
“Holidays are harder for us than they are for you. Our child got shot.”

The awesome lady at your workplace, inexplicably and forever single.
“I won’t ever marry. I was going to, but he got shot.”

Unspoken Communication.










20 Answers from Mike Yard of “The Nightly Show”


One of the many amazing things about twitter is the opportunity to communicate with people you admire. Political leaders, entertainers, artists… They are often wonderfully open and accessible. After reading an interview with comedian Mike Yard (@mikeyardcomedy) of The Nightly Show,” I had more questions.  Twenty of them. And he had answers for me!

1) If you could painlessly poof one living human into an alternate universe (not this one), who would it be?

Dick Cheney

(I love your answer to this one. A lot.)

2) Does falling in love mess with one’s comedy chops? Does it take the edge off one’s humor? #AskingforaFriend

Nothing is allowed to mess with my comedy. So that’s a negative on that.

3) You’re Supreme Leader for 10 sweet minutes. You command a joint session of Congress to flash mob. What song?

lil Mama… Sausage

4) Are you a secret fanboy of any particular intellectual or creative endeavor? (i.e. Astrophysics, Puppetry?)

A big science fiction fan. If that counts…

5) What is the most underrated comedy TV series of all time? Most underrated comedy film? Underrated comedian?

This was a tough one. Benson, Office Space and Dick Gregory.

[SIDEBAR] I fell in love with Benson on Soap! (My most underrated TV comedy of all time.)

Thought that one but went with Benson.

I’m loving this. It’s fabulous when an artist you admire admires another artist you admire. (Robert Guillaume was great on Sports Night!)

6) Who is the most unexpected celebrity you ever had a romantic or sexy dream about? (And please #Keepit100.)

Susan Sarandon… Idk why…

She is wicked sexy and also good people, so this is not at all unexpected, IMO.

7) Of the celebrities you’ve met, who most thrilled you at the time? And who most thrills you in retrospect?

Jesse Jackson, Bill Nye.

8) Not counting your career (comedy), what is your best thing? (#ProTip: False modesty is rarely interesting.)


9) We are way, WAY overdue. What would be your 28th Amendment to the US Constitution?

No politician can be financed by any corporation in any way shape or form period…

10) If you could star in any movie remake, what film would you choose, and which role would you play? PS: It is taking all of my self-discipline not to ask you follow-ups to all of these great / interesting answers!

Star Wars… Han Solo

YES! That was what I was hoping you’d say!

11) Luther has POTUS covered. If you were an anger translator, for which public figure (M/F) would you work?

Michelle Obama

(Tied with Cheney and “Sausage” for fave answer!)

12) The Designated Hitter Rule: Totes fine, or abomination?


13) Not counting the DH Rule, what issue, argument or controversy gets you the most uncontrollably worked up?

Cops shooting unarmed Black Men

14) If you haven’t already chosen one (and even if you have), what is your theme song?

All of the Above by Maino.

15) If you could repeat one year of your life (changing nothing, just living it again), which year, and why?

1st time I did stand up… I had found my purpose.

16) Have you ever defused a dangerous situation with humor?

Yes, In New Rochelle NY.

17) Do you feel you may have prevented injury or death in New Rochelle? Were you, yourself, in danger doing so?

Yes they were gonna fight each other… Anytime there’s a fight anything can happen, so maybe a li’l.

18) If you could make one animated film free to all children on-demand in their language, which would you share?

The Lion King.

19) If you could resurrect one late comedian or comedic actor at the peak of their talent, who would you bring back?

Richard Pryor.

20) Of the characters you’ve played / segments you’ve been part of on The Nightly Show,” which is your favorite?

The panel discussion on Black fatherhood… [Watch it here.]

Letting me ask 20 questions, and taking the time to tweet me funny and interesting answers? You made my whole weekend. Thank you, Mike Yard!